Inspire | Love & Relationship

Violence is Not Love

Kamis, 17 Mar 2022 16:13 WIB
Violence is Not Love
Jakarta -

Violence in dating or abusive relationships is quite common. We often heard some people are struggling with their partner's abusive behavior, be it from the internet, movies, or even our circle of friends. People who are stuck in these situations generally force themselves to survive and stay with their abusive partner rather than trying to leave or move on. The main common reason why people tend to choose to stay in this mentally and physically destructive relationship is the mindset of; considering their partner's hitting and cursing habits are their way to express emotion that is understood and accepted with grace. Because of the love that is too deep, the victim only could see the good side of the perpetrator rather than the negative side. Therefore, the victim is to be treated arbitrarily rather than being left by the partner.

There are two kinds of abusive behavior: physical and verbal abuse. Neither of them is a better reason to stay put with the perpetrator. Verbal abuse is when someone repeatedly uses their words to frighten, degrade or control the victim, and somehow, it could lead to physical abuse. We can't deny that being in a relationship also involves an argument that elevates to a certain emotional level. However, it can be considered verbal abuse when your partner starts to use words that bring you to an uncomfortable situation and hurt you emotionally. If they make you feel worthless by degrading you with words, do you still consider it love? You should not. As for physical abuse, we all know that this is the flaming red flag in a relationship you need to run from and stop deceiving yourself that they do it out of love. When they start attacking you physically there's no way that you have to stick up with them and try to change or fix them   it's not your job!

Even though it is widely acknowledged that getting out of a toxic and abusive relationship is easier said than done. The number of people who are struggling in this kind of relationship could be very high, where the victims are struggling with the abusive behavior of their partner and deceiving themselves that their partners are doing it because of love. However, being stuck in this relationship doesn't mean that the victim is unaware of the situation. Some people don't know how to get out of it as they fear the given threats and actions that the perpetrator would take on them. This 'trapped' feeling will get the victim nowhere but low self-esteem and constant anxiety.

Getting out of this situation is not an easy job, yet you also need to remember that you deserve to live freely and not be shadowed by fear. It would be easier for people to say 'just leave' from their point of view, yet it's not as easy as it seems for the person who stands in the position. However, no matter how hard it is for you to leave your partnerwho gives you constant fear and abusive behavior   you need to know that it's not your job to make them a better person. The only thing you need to be concerned about is yourself, your safety, and your well-being. If you still think that their actions are based on their love for you, why would they make you fear them whenever they're angry? Stop deceiving yourself and process the reason why they do that. If they hurt you emotionally and physically, you need to run from them no matter how.

[Gambas:Audio CXO]

(DIP/MEL)